Not so long ago I decided it was time for me to start approaching at unconventional places. Buses, subway, the street, libraries, stores and supermarkets, just to give a few examples, are all
enormous possibilities. After all, during the day I see much better looking women around – and the competition is far less numerous.
Few people dare to approach during daytime and that’s something great. What they do in the end is just to leave the way clear for us.
Still, the reality is that it is really hard to make those first approaches and to start doing this seriously. There are a lot of prejudices and a lot of fear. It’s just not normal to be doing this and feels naturally awkward. But the goal is to get over it and
start taking advantage of all the possibilities approaching during the day opens.
What I first realized is that when approaching women in these unconventional places there are two important things to take into account:
1-
You have to inspire safety.
2-
You have to be as natural as possible.
Inspiring safety is a vital point. If you don’t do it, you’ll create unnecessary tension and you will most surely end up failing as well. How safe is for her to speak with you is directly related with your appearance. Make sure to be well dressed, clean and don’t be wearing anything that could label you as creepy.
Then, be careful choosing where and when to approach. A dark alley in the late afternoon and with few people around is not the best spot and I guess you kind of understand why. Instead, you should focus on approaching in an environment that would look safe to her. A park, a bus full of people or a well-lit store are a few examples.
But safety is not enough; it’s kind of an absolute necessity for you to start. Once you have it, the trick is to be natural. It would be normal for you, me and everyone to be nervous in situations like these ones, but you got to be as natural as possible. Do as if you would be speaking with a friend or someone you know. The best way to do this is to
approach fast! The more time you take to approach the girl you want, the more nervous you’ll get. You just have to forget about everything and go forward.
Then, as for the approach itself there are another group of important things you should take special attention to.
Be direct - Most of the internet says that the best way to approach women during the day is by saying some small thing about the environment, making some cute anecdote or, in the end, giving some indirect talk. The truth is that they are all wrong. In these kind of situations nothing is more effective than being direct. Don’t do small talk, don’t take girl’s time saying some random comments. Get straight to the point: you think she is cute and you had to meet her. Speak about her, make her feel important and, above all, comfortable.
Be positive – And by all means, don’t play defensively. One girl might come and tell you “Do you usually do this?” or “Do you always approach women in the cafe?”. In this case, just say that yes, you do. Be natural and keep playing her game. Be positive, smile and give value. That’s the key. As soon as you get in a defensive stance, your options will start waning.
Failure is an option – Not every girl you approach actually wants to be approached. Few have boyfriends, another couple are just uninterested in meeting you and a last few just won’t like you. So assume that rejection could happen. It’s certainly embarrassing to be rejected in public and in front of many other people, but it’s all worth the risk.
Practice is the key – As in every other skill, picking up girls is all about practice. Your first street approaches might be a big failure. I still remember the first couple of times I tried and how horrible it was to be sent away. But never give up and keep going, keep practicing and you’ll get better at it. It’s not easy to become one dangerous man during the day, but it’s actually not that hard either. If you seriously want to do this, put objectives. Approach at least one woman in an unconventional place everyday. If you can, approach even more. But do it! Practice and make a habit of it!
How To Approach Women
Do you feel awkward or uneasy to approach women? Has it ever happened to you that you see some woman and you feel deeply interested but could not gather up the courage to go and talk to her? Do you feel as if you are being stopped or dragged backwards when it comes to the matter of making an approach to a woman?
If the answers to all the questions are in affirmative, it is clear how frustrating it can be to you. There is no reason to think that it is only you who find it very tough to make an approach to the women. Just reveal this fact about you to a group of male friends of your, and you will discover that you are not the only one. There are many who do not simply know how to approach women. They feel thoroughly paralyzed with fear and uneasiness whenever the thought of approaching a woman dawns upon them. What is more interesting, they have got no explanation for this kind of queer behavior.
If you have been a victim of this problem that is common to most of the men, this page will be of immense help to you since here you will get very important and valuable tips on how to approach women. Follow these tips and suggestions if you really want to approach women and impress her deeply. Here go the tips.
Tip 1 on how to approach women
The thing that holds you back whenever you are in your bid to make an approach to a woman is nothing but an approach anxiety. What you have got to do, is nothing but to come over that anxiety and become free and frank enough within yourself. Keep it in your mind for all the time that if you are not free within yourself, it will never be possible for you to be frank with the woman to whom you want to make an approach.
You must have already been immensely eager to know how you would be able to come over this approach anxiety. To tackle approach anxiety, what you should do before everything, is to understand what it is and what problems it causes. It is nothing but a strong fear that prevents you from approaching a woman. Are you wondering how and why it happens? It occurs to you since you get too much occupied with the thoughts about how to approach women methodically and perfectly. When you are occupied with these thoughts, it is never possible for you to succeed in approaching women.
What you have got to do in order to make an impressive approach to the women, is to go straight to the woman and strike a conversation with an air of natural frankness and spontaneity. Spontaneity is something that will render the woman with no way but to continue the conversation with you, even though the fact may be that the woman does not like your presence at that very moment. Start with saying ‘Hi’, and you are already in the game.
Tip 2 on how to approach women
Do never be thoroughly and impulsively preoccupied with the thoughts about how the woman would react or what you will say in reply to the reaction of the woman to your saying ‘hi’ to her. Here are some of the thoughts that occupy the men before they even think of making an approach to women. Take care that you do not have these thoughts in your mind before you approach any woman. The thoughts are generally as follow:
“I may not be the perfect kind of person that she would like to go for.”
“I am not confident enough so that I can make a smart and impressive approach to her”
“How ridiculously people will be laughing at me when they would come to know about my foolish approach and being denied by the woman!”
Eliminating these thoughts would be the first step while the second step will be to incur doubts within you about the supposed inefficiency of yours to impress a woman. These doubts will result in the heightening of your confidence that is one of the dire necessities in order to make an approach to women.
The third step will be to imagine how the girl or the woman can react to your approach. Imagine, but have no fear or anxiety in your mind since they can make your imagination go into a wrong way. As a result, you will not be able to gather up the confidence to approach the woman. It will be an opportunity for you if you get the chance to watch the woman for some time before you approach her. Within this time you have got to have an impression of the nature of the girl. This will help you gauge how the girl can react.
The fourth step will be to have a clear conception of what kind of a man you want to pose before the woman. If you have it from earlier time, you are not likely to fumble before her or to create a mixed impression in her so that she gets confused and decides not to go further with the conversation. Take care that you do not make a mess in your bid to create the impression about you as a dynamic person in the woman. In that case you will end up in confusing the woman utterly.
Tip 3 on how to approach women
If you happen to be already a somehow experienced and efficient person who knows how to approach woman, do try to master the art by finding out innovative methods of making impressive and unique approaches. There are hundreds of tricks to make an approach to women. It is also true that only a few among those tricks work in all the cases. The others work if they somehow click and if they somehow happen to be commensurate with the situation and the nature of the woman. You have got to find out those few tricks that work for all kinds of women in all kinds of situations. You will be, then, really a master in the field of how to approach women.
